By Oreva Godwin
Humans are naturally drawn to danger. The thrill. The curiosity. We hate pain, yet we chase what will eventually make us cry.
Oreva
Men often say women don’t know what they want. That’s not true. A real woman knows exactly what she wants and yes, sometimes she’s attracted to bad guys.
Hold your horses, men. I’m not here to tell you to start acting bad. If it’s not in you, it’s not in you. There’s a woman for every man, just be real, and the right one will cherish you.
But here’s the puzzle: why do so many women love bad guys? First, let’s clear the air. When I say “bad guys,” I don’t mean criminals or junkies. I mean womanisers. Players. Smooth tongues. The men who have seen life, explored it, not pretend about it, and still have women chasing after them.
Now, let me explain. Real women are not looking for active bad boys. They’re drawn to retired bad boys, the ones who have had their fill of the streets, partied, explored, conquered, and now feel it’s time to settle with a woman and build a home. Those men? That’s who women fall for. Real women don’t look for saints.
Fear poor and unexplored men. Poverty can make a man look decent. He’ll act moral and disciplined because he doesn’t have the means to misbehave. But give him money and the spotlight, and you’ll see his true character.
Rich decent men? Women love them. But the poor or average ones, who can’t afford the clubs, restaurants, or elite circles, those are the men women fear the most. Because once such men finally taste money, they often lose control.
Hypocrites in white robes.
Then we have the hypocrites. Men hiding behind religion, pretending to be saints. They use God, church, or morality as a cover. They act like they don’t like women, condemn others, and play the “good guy” role. But women with sharp instincts see through them. These men end up being worse than the so-called bad guys they criticize.
Why bad guys win?
Bad guys are predictable. With them, heartbreak is at your own risk. A woman knows she might not be the only one, but she also knows where she stands. All she cares about is owning his heart.
The “good guys,” on the other hand, are the real heartbreakers. They build castles of loyalty, faithfulness, and trust in a woman’s mind, only to destroy her when she least expects it. That betrayal cuts deeper than a bad guy’s honesty.
Real women prefer men who admit who they are. Women hate lies more than they hate the truth. A man may confess, “I’m not faithful,” and she’ll fight him at first. But later, she’ll respect him for being real, more than she’ll ever respect the sweet-tongued liar.
Tope was a young lady, ready for a relationship. She had suffered in the hands of bad boys and had often questioned herself, “why do I keep falling for bad guys? Is it a curse?” She was a jealous lover. She hated sharing. So she craved for a faithful partner, one who respected his body and was committed to only her.
Then she met Ola, and he wowed her. He was decent, religious, caring, had morals and castigated men that sleep around and use ladie as toys. To him? Women are meant to be loved, respected and worshipped. If only she knew she was in for a major heart disaster.
Unknown to Tope, Ola was the worst. A true bad boy with an innocent face and a sweet tongue. Ola lacked class; he went for everything in skirts, unlike her exes who had specifications of a particular type of girls they go down with. For Ola? All body sizes, any social class. He even went as far as sleeping with the cleaner in his office and even slept with room keepers in hotels.
When Tope knew who Ola was, it was too late, she was deeply in love. The heartbreak was epic. He was the worst of them all. She said to herself, “the devil I know is better than the angel I don’t know.” “Tope’s pain taught her a bitter truth.”
Eze was an alpha male. He believed that he didn’t have to present himself as a saint to get a woman. The deal? Accept me as I am or walk away. Surprisingly, this got him any woman he truly wanted. He was not stingy. He knew how to treat his women right. He spoilt them with expensive gifts, vacations, love, care, and attention.
He openly told he wants to date, “I love you, and I want you, but know that you’re not gonna be the only woman I sleep with. I’m not a saint, please, but no one will ever own my heart. It belongs to you and you alone. You will never catch me with another woman or suspect me, I will give you that respect, I am only telling you because I hate pretence and lies.”
Shockingly, with such information women still fall for him and other men always asked him how come these women knew him as a bad guy and still fell for? His reply always was, “because I’m real, I don’t present myself in ways am not. I know how to spoil my woman in ways a lot of men can never do and I give them the best sex of their lives.” “Eze, on the other, was a man who made no apologise for who he was.”
Deborah believed in growing with a good and decent man. She met a decent looking man, ambitious, hardworking and goal driven. A man ruled by morals, faithful and not into the ways of the world. He was her ideal husband. Andy, on the other hand, felt privileged that a lady like her could love him. He spoilt her from the little he had.
Andy had never been to the club or partied. He was too busy trying to build a life for himself and every penny counted. He saw socializing as a waste of money. To him, paying for sex was insane. Get a woman you love and enjoy sex with her.
Over the years, life began to blossom. He became wealthy, relocated to Lagos. Bought a house in the heart of Lagos and started mingling with the movers and shakers of Lagos. Andy gradually became what he once stood against.
He started paying girls for sex. Top influencers, top business ladies, he had them in his bed by the power of his money. He partied endlessly and was always getting home late with a hangover. He saw his wife as beneath his taste in women. Suddenly giving her money became an issue.
To him, he was enjoying all the time he slaved for. Unknown to him, it was poverty that made him feel like he had morals. Deborah totally regretted her choice of a man. She saw how money had changed Andy and wished they could go back to when they were struggling. She was pained because she left her ex who was wealthy and treated her like a queen, just because he was a bad boy. Sadly, she chose Andy because she felt he was the opposite of her ex. She lived a life of regret.
Evelyn was done with men. She decided that she needed a religious leader as her lover, a man committed to only her. She felt the fear of his closeness to God would discipline him for her. She met Abdul, and they courted briefly. Little did she know that she was in for a religious bad boy with a disguised life.
Andy slept with his flock, both married and single. He dated friends and even went as far as spoiling the name of his sex partner to their friends just to get them in bed.
Evelyn became a mockery to the church. She couldn’t give orders without being challenged or questioned. When the rumours of his philandering got to her she was left in shock. Evidences were too glaring to be questioned. She was left in shame of her choice of a husband.
Evelyn cried that what she ran from made her to go into the worst. She married a religious hypocrite. A man of zero morals and standard. A man who could not respect her by doing his shit outside her environment. She couldn’t believe the disrespect. She thought her past relationships did disrespect her, but this was the worst. She fell into depression. She thought she found holiness, but she found hypocrisy.
These men should stop pretending. They should stop acting holy when they’re not. Show your partner who you really are.
Women don’t love bad boys because they’re clueless. They love men they can defend, men who won’t make them look stupid in the end.
It’s not bad men women fear. It’s liars in good men’s clothing.Women don’t fall for bad men. They fall for honest ones even if the truth stings. Men should stop hiding behind a white coat.
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